GUTS

September 5, 2007 at 5:34 pm (D&D, nostalgia)

Before I finally complete my previous media update, I’d like to describe a more recent D&D character I’ve played recently, having been reminded by some overseas mail of one of my all time favorites. (Thanks Jon! I pity the DM who lets me play that particular character again.) Apologies to those who stumble upon this and have no idea what I’m talking about.

Guts is simply a force of nature. He’s my half-orc epic level frenzied berserker. I’m not sure you know what this means so I’ll go ahead and tell you. He cannot die while he’s in a frenzy which is pretty much the same as rage except the bonuses and penalties are greater and they also stack onto those of rage. He also has Supreme Power Attack. This essentially allows him to deal his regular damage + 80 with each attack. Yeah. He’s also wielding a mercurial great sword. Critical multiplier of x4 baby.

Did I mention our party fought the Tarrasque? I’d like to say that my character had quite a hand in this. I’d also say Guts could have taken it on by himself. In fact, he kept the Tarrasque dead while most of our party bartered their souls away to Mephistopheles for a wish to destroy this dreadful beast. Thus, Guts was left to his own devices at the southern pole of Eberron. Rumor is that he became the new Tarrasque.

Role-play wise he was fun, much better than Orange Crush, although only slightly more intelligible. His voice is a nearly indescribable screech which brought the DM to tears on a number of occasions. Having gotten covered with the insides of a hostile beast, the barbarian would announce, “That’s why they call me GUTS!”, spittle and blood flying from his gaping mouth onto whomever he was introducing himself to. Who they were was never ascertained.

Whenever someone or something did damage to Guts, he was forced into a frenzy unless he made a will save, which made for a couple of awkward situations with the rest of the party. Luckily the party saw the benefits of having Guts around, or perhaps they were unsure how to get rid of the ticking time bomb.

Guts wasn’t much of a talker unless his best friend Nom was around. I call him Nom for the reader’s benefit, but being a Chaos Gnome, Nom would choose names at a whim. Or should I say, adopt the names that Guts had called him that day: “That’s why I calls you Wally!” after Nom had been slammed into a wall. “That’s why I calls him Flamey!” Nom had (has?) a thing for fire, etc.

There’s much more or much less to Guts than I’ve presented here but, much like any other force of nature, you really have to witness him in action to understand his full effect.

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8 Comments

  1. riphoudouso said,

    Guts transcended reality in swinging a giant sword harder than any mortal could conceive. There’s an opening in the half-orc patheon for a barbarian god.

    The Legend of Guts is carved in the annals of Korranberg.

  2. Wes said,

    “The Legend of Guts” is carved in just about everyone from Khorvaire to Xen’Drik. Nom and Guts made a rather interesting combination to say the least. Typically in a ‘duo’, there is some measure of polarity. Smart and dumb, strong and weak (and though they were somewhat unorthodox themselves, “The Ultimate Duo” does come to mind), though somehow this duo was reckless abandon combined with . . . reckless abandon. Mugsy Longish McMappy Wendy Stabby Wally Chokie Monkey Crater-face Gutsy-brains Fally Flamey-spider-snakebite Goosie Geysie Screamy the Generous just wouldn’t have been the same without him, though.

  3. truth9 said,

    Reading this post just makes me want to cry.

    You fought the tarrasque.

    I hate you all.

  4. asfarasthoughtcanreach said,

    It took what, all of 5 or 6 rounds to defeat? Anyways, that was the third edition Tarrasque, and fourth edition is coming upon us. Perhaps the new version will be more of a challenge.

    You should just get back here already. In all honesty, mister riphoudouso needs a break from DMing (although he seems to be planning an Immortal campaign), and neither Wes or myself feel up to the mantle. Well I don’t. Wes is probably too busy to plan a campaign…

  5. truth9 said,

    Oh, well, that’s alright then.

    I’ve already decided that I’m keeping everyone weak for my next game. And I want to DM again, though I kind of wonder how the group dynamics have changed with the new players.

    And I’d prefer that the Immortal game didn’t happen with the new players before we get back, as it’s unbelievably fun to watch new players experience stuff for the first time (unless y’all have been spoiling things for them, which I doubt you have).

    Regardless, April seems very likely.

  6. Wes said,

    Mantle shmantle. And no, don’t feel much up to it.

  7. Wes said,

    And I’m sorry to say that with the new players, the dynamic has changed little. They more often than not don’t take any sort of initiative, which is a bit disappointing, but then again, I probably wasn’t the enthusiastic gamer I am today right from day one.

  8. asfarasthoughtcanreach said,

    I’d say me and you are a bit at fault for their lack of initiative. Methinks we overwhelm the poor souls with our outlandishness.

    I don’t think we’ve spoiled Immortal for the new recruits…

    And now I’m looking hopefully towards April.

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